I’m on my mac, on my sofa. Small doggie warming my feet. Child outside (it’s the holidays), guinea pigs grateful for the spring grass. I’m not so grateful as usual because normally I’d be sunbathing by now… what on earth has happened to the weather this year?
So it’s April… I want to rewind four years, to April 2012, when I was 43. I was knee deep in legal documents. OMG, this isn’t how a creative person sees their life but I kept telling myself it wouldn’t last forever. I was about to pull off the deal of my lifetime, get the house of my dreams paid off outright, buy a crazy lime green brand new car and pay my folks off so we could all retire in luxury. They weren’t 43 and really deserved to stop working so hard… My goodness, it felt like the best feeling ever to do something so huge for the people who made me. So yeah, though the paperwork was chewing my brain up, I vowed to get through it without moaning.
Fast forward three months and we are in my lawyer’s office. A bit of stickiness later (there always seems to be last minute drama with these things), and everything was signed. Lots of dosh was electronically transferred into my bank account, and we went out to celebrate.
What was I doing?
I was selling my business.
The business I built from an idea, a concept, a passion, a need to serve, a wish to change the world. My very own Vision Of Love.
Why did I sell it? Because I didn’t want to grow it any more, and I certainly didn’t want it to shrink. And because I’d done it, had enough and wanted to move on.
But what to do?
Well, that wasn’t clear. So I did what all pensioners do. I gardened. I made my allotment so abundant and awesome. I made the land around my house beautiful. I planted and planted and planted. Then I harvested and harvested and harvested.
I felt like these fruits of my labour were symbolic with the fruits of my business labour. As I gave my all to my old business, I gave my all to the earth. I knew if I stayed connected to her, I’d get my answer.
People offered me deals. Told me what I should do. Told me what everyone else was doing. After being self employed for 16 years, I wouldn’t ever compromise my work life, so all the shoulds and the shiny things I was being told about meant nothing to me. I gardened some more.
One day, almost a year after retiring, I ran out of netting, for my broccoli. I went to the garden centre, a place that was fast becoming my second home. Then BANG. My world changed forever.
With all the love I have in my heart, I STILL feel anger for the man who thought it’d be a good idea to reverse his pick up truck right into my legs.
Crippled for three months, I found myself crying one day, thinking “this is my life now…” Then a wave of love washed over me.
If this was going to be my life, I’d do it in style. I started thinking about getting a pink sparkly disabled car so I could at least get off my deck (it was sunny three years ago).
The positive, unlimited me was back. If not in body, in mind. I’ve moved mountains in my life. I’ve done everything that everyone told me I couldn’t, I was not about to give up now, even if my legs were useless.
With this fresh perspective, I booked myself in on an iboga weekend. It happened to be 20 paces from my house, or I wouldn’t have been able to go. I was determined to get my legs back, and asked for that in the opening circle. After 48 hours, I was able to walk, and even very stiffly dance (OK, I always dance stiffly!)…
I was back! Though three years on I still can’t walk like I used to, I’m able bodied again, and I won’t let this hinder me in any way.
Learning to walk properly again took a lot of time, therapy and dedication. And as I focused on getting my legs strong, my mind started churning like it used to. Ideas started forming. Gardening couldn’t happen as I couldn’t move that much, but I also didn’t need to garden so much any more. My mind was finally onto something.
What did I really want to do? NO, I defo didn’t want to write another recipe book! Or go back into retail! Or even have another TV show.
I only wanted one thing… to love, teach and inspire people like you who hadn’t yet achieved their dreams. Who hadn’t yet spearheaded one revolution, let alone multiple revolutions. Who hadn’t had the chance to feel so utterly abundant that they could buy their dream home outright and help their parents retire in style.
Because ultimately, I’ve achieved my dreams. I have a very abundant and happy life. I want for nothing. I have no need or wish to do all that again.
BUT I want to help you do it.
And that’s why I’m dedicated now to helping you get your business off the ground.
https://shazzie.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/04/retired_featured.png500500Shazzlehttps://shazzie.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2019/02/shazzie_logo_2019.pngShazzle2016-04-07 12:56:192019-06-19 11:15:11I retired aged 43, then didn't know what to do!