My life with Evie has been the most beautiful unfolding lesson of love ever. One day, as she was writhing on the floor with total bliss washing over her face, I said to her “You’re an ecstatic being”. In that moment a phrase which is now being used worldwide was coined. As a result of that one observation, my life now revolves around creating an ecstatic life for Evie and myself. We delight in the rippling effect that it has on everyone we meet. Out of all the natural parenting ways, there are two simple things you can do for your child that will cause her to become an ecstatic grown up:
Breastfeeding and right-brained parenting
I had an ecstatic four year breastfeeding career with Evie. Before she was born, I decided I would breastfeed for as long as we were both happy with it. I also decided I wouldn’t do “discreet breastfeeding” as I cannot feel shame for publicly giving my child the food she was designed to have. Why would anyone be discreet about anything they do? Do life loud and do life proud. Shame has no home in the temple of the ecstatic being.
When I was pregnant, people would ask “What if you can’t breastfeed? What will you do?” As a natural mother who believes in creating her own reality, this wasn’t an option. I know how important breastfeeding is, and I was fully equipped to do it. Our culture weirdly views breastfeeding as an option. Why choose to give your child inferior food and create unnatural separation as soon as it’s born? I really feel for people who actually can’t breastfeed. And I also feel for those who think they can’t do it just because they haven’t been helped enough. I’ve been there with that blistering stabbing pain, too! Doulas and midwives are invaluable after birth. They can help women breastfeed the child comfortably by adjusting their positions, checking the child is latched on and suggesting those short-term life-saving silicone nipple guards and cabbage leaves!
I loved breastfeeding from the second I started doing it. Evie was a very good sucker from the word go. My little boobs turned into great big hot milk bottles in a couple of days. People would ask me when I planned to stop when I’d only just started. “When Evie decides” was always my answer. Faces would get pulled by some, while others became more intrigued. My friends who live like me were all fully supportive.
In the first years as a single mother, I didn’t have any kind of night life. Once, I had the chance to go out for the night. Evie was about one and a half, and still very dependent on my boobs. My friend offered to look after Evie. During the evening she called me and said Evie was twiddling with her boobs.
“When you’re a mother you only need to have a life about once a month, any more than that would be burning the rolling pin at both ends.”
Children twiddle with boobs to release the hormone oxytocin which causes extra milk flow. At this time, my friend was still feeding her son so she had milk. She asked if I’d be happy if she fed Evie. I cried with joy. Here was someone who understood what it is to be a full-time natural mother.
The way of a natural parent-child relationship can also involve making love with your partner when breastfeeding or co-sleeping. This is how children are raised in real societies; they are part of a family that does everything together.
Children are energetically attached to their mothers up until the age of four (an age where many children self-wean). If you were making love while your child was in another building, she’d still know, she knows everything you do.
Throughout my breastfeeding career, I took Evie everywhere with me and I loved to feed her with the elements. Wearing her out by playing on the swings, running in the woods, and dancing before each bedtime (naked with wigs on) became our right-brained rootina. She didn’t watch any TV before she was three, at all. Children don’t want to go to bed early if they’ve been cooped up in nursery or at home all day because they’re still hungry to be fed by the sky and earth. Taking them to the beach and forest fills them up and they sleep perfectly.
Going from dreamtime to clocking in time takes some effort, but over the years, you can coax most free-thinking right brained children into a boxtor. The copious use of bait such as sweets, TV, rootinas, arguments, high-rise buildings, urban living and fried food converts over 90% of children into left-brained good citizens who question nothing in their lives. Of course, ecstatic children given a free range life can’t be coaxed into a boxtor at all. These are the children of our present.
Children come from the great oneness that is you, me, the chair you’re sitting on, and the tree you’re growing in your garden. When they’re born, they have all their instinct intact. If a child is nurtured correctly, she will grow up with her instinct still there and be a fully alive, open, loving and unique adult. Everything we do, say, feel and think feeds our children on an energetic level, which is why we choose to live consciously at all times. Ecstatic Beings choose to act out of love, and they treat their children as the real people that they are. We don’t own our children.
Having a child is the greatest lesson in non attachment ever. This applies to the ornaments they break when they fall over as much as the hearts they break when they leave home. The dreamlike state that children are in when they are born gradually shifts over time.
If you let your child watch the television before the age of three or teach left-brained activities too early, the dreamlike state will disappear quicker as chemicals and brain patterns are altered. It’s healthy for our young children to frequently access otherly realms up until about the age of four. The brains of children who cry to sleep or cry for their food (as will often happen with bottle feeding), or those suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder get wired incorrectly. When these children grow up, they have a much higher chance of becoming addicted to something, whether that be sex, drugs, alcohol, work or gambling. The world’s best medicine Iboga can reconnect that part of the brain, so it’s invaluable in the treatment of addictions and PTSD.
Simply put, if we get enough DMT (the spirit molecule, pumped from our pineal gland when we are dreaming or dreamy) and oxytocin (the love and bonding hormone from breastmilk, which is absent in formula milk) as children, we won’t have to look for substitutes as adults. Emotionally nourished children grow up independent, loving, happy and stable.
We are lucky to have this information at such a critical time, because we can now make a choice as to how to bring up the people we love the most. We know deep down what they deserve and need so it’s just a case of us putting ourselves into a position where we can give them that. This means that we gather ourselves into tribes, that we all look after each other’s children, that we celebrate the turning of life: revering wise women, looking after birthing goddesses and adoring the men who protect us. Creating a whole new genre of parenting such as this is all possible right now, as soon as you think it so. Imagine raising a child that never has to try to fit into an outdated and irrelevant system. Clocking in has been eternally gazumped by clocking off.
PS: For more advice on how to live as an Ecstatic Being in these crazy times, click here.